75: Kerry Burki on Listening to Your Younger Self, Learning to Say No, and Shifting Your Mindset
Kerry Burki had an idea simmering in her head ever since high school. She wanted to make all women feel beautiful. This idea sat in her head for years before she would finally unleash it.
Kerry's story starts like a lot of our stories. We have a kernel of an idea that sits in our heads. Sometimes we act on it, but more often than not, we let it sit. Then, something pushes us to act on it. Kerry's push came twenty years later in the form of her time in Marie Forleo's B School.
Kerry was working on a blog called Handmade Success, which helps people sell their work on Etsy, when her kernel of an idea crept back in her head. The only difference was, this time, instead of pushing the idea away again, Kerry decided to pull the trigger.
She asked women of all different ages and sizes to come over for a photo shoot. And with the help of a photographer friend, she began the first shoot of what became Kerry Magazine. She was finally doing her part in making all women feel beautiful. What started off as a small idea in her head has evolved into a full-blown magazine with three issues under its belt.
In this episode, Kerry talks about letting your younger self guide you, learning to say no, and shifting your mindset, among many other things.
Here are three things you can learn from Kerry:
Let Your Younger Self Guide YouWe all have ambitious ideas when we're young and naive, before life gets in the way. We believe the whole world is our stage. We believe we can do anything.
Most of the time we let those ideas go and we lose our way. Just like Kerry did. "I feel like we have things about ourselves when we're younger that could guide us as we get older, you know, for what we want to do in the world, the changes we would see and everything, but sometimes... you can get really way off track. And that definitely happened to me."
While most of us never act on those ideas. Some of us do. All it takes is listening to what your inner voice is telling you to do. Because if you do it right, executing your ideas can change your life. "Sometimes I think it is kinda important to get back in touch with your younger self and see if you can remember what some of those ideals were and see if some ideas pop up... because since I've been working on this, it's been awesome and amazing and so fun, and it's not even anything I was thinking about over the last twenty years and there's some stuff that we knew when we were younger that I think we've forgotten."
Learn to Say NoOne of the things that plagues many people is our discomfort with saying no. When people ask us to do something, it feels uncomfortable saying no them. But that's exactly what Kerry did.
Instead of agreeing to lead a class for kids' yoga, she decided it was best to say no. Because once that door was open, she was afraid she would be known as someone teaches kids' yoga. "I didn't want that to be what I'm known for, and it's not what I do. So it was interesting to have to come and figure out who do I want to help, what do I want to be doing, and to say no to things that don't go with that."
Kerry was afraid that she would fill up all her time with things she didn't want to do. Instead, she asked herself who she wanted to help and who she wanted to align with. Doing this would help clear her path forward. "I felt like I could have filled myself up so that when something did come along, I would have been like I don't have time for it. Right? And that would have been hard, you need to find where you need to be aligned , who you need to be aligned with... I started adding to what I say to myself in the morning... in the beginning of the day to say 'Please allow the people who are going to light my path to easily show up in my life today.' And when I read that, I said I need to start saying that every morning. Open myself up to allow the right people to come in that will help you see the path of you where you want to go forward."
Shift Your MindsetOne of the keys to Kerry's creative breakthrough was changing her mindset. Like most creatives, she used to have a mindset of fear and scarcity. After all, doing nothing is much easier than doing something. But once she re-framed her mindset, things started to work in her favor.
"I feel like there's a lot I've learned. That you have to come from a place of being open to receive instead of fear of that scarcity. Like I'm not going to be able to figure it out or people aren't going to want to do it. That's just an easier place, your thoughts just go there easier, and again I just started coming up with re-framing those types of thoughts and repeating it... a lot and saying 'It's all going to work out. It's all going to come together.' And... when I do that regularly, it works."
The biggest mindset shift comes from looking at things in a positive light. When you expect good things to happen, they really do start to happen. "Really, if you can switch to being open and expecting to receive good to come your way... it's almost like a light switch. It can really start to shift things."
